Yes, I needed to do just that. My lack of social media presence, including here on the blog, has been somewhat intentional. It seemed to me that everything that I was trying to accomplish was going nowhere. Words weren’t coming out right. The posts that I penned were riddled with negative self-talk that I don’t want to put out there. Even the book seemed to be falling flat. I needed to just unplug a bit. Take some time to find my writing mojo again. This happens when you recognize that everything you’re putting on the page is complete crappola.
I also unplugged myself from social media today for the most part. Why? Well, Mother’s Day isn’t exactly the best holiday in the world for those of us who can’t or don’t have children through no choice of our own. Yes, I took my mom out and I did nice things, including a French inspired brunch with crepes. Saturday, we went out and did dinner at one of her favorite restaurants and a movie that she wanted to see. And she did post a sweet message from Pippin as a Mother’s Day wish for me.
Honestly, I try not to let it bother me. I can’t really help it that it does. I wanted a family. I wanted to know the joys and pains of motherhood. It is increasingly clear that while it is a natural part of life for most women, it is just not meant to be for me. Pippin is about as close to motherhood as I will get. So today was just packed full of reminders of something I will never have in my life that I’ve desperately wanted. Unplugging was my only option.
Work has been keeping me hopping with a lot of drive time the last couple weeks. I’m taking some time away from the book for fear of ruining it. Occasionally, I find that it really is helpful to just shift gears. So I’ve taken up the needle again. The sewing needle that is. A change of medium is often a fantastic distraction. Sewing has always been a good way for me to de-stress and just think. Often I work out problems with plot or scenes by doing something else. Writing involves much more thinking about the story than actually writing it.
Usually, I do embroidery. I have a lot of pictures of various projects that I’ve done. From simple bags and tapestry like pieces, to pillows, and cases I’ve worked on many things. For a while now, I’ve been wanting to put my embroidery to use in a new way. I have also wanted to learn a new skill in hand quilting. I’ve done a little bit with some projects in the past but I’ve never really tried my hand at a full quilt. My office isn’t far from a little shop that specializes in quilting. So, I stopped in and decided to get some things to start a new project to learn the technique with. Now, I’m working on a patchwork quilt to go on my own bed.
It may seem like an old-fashioned hobby. I guess it is. I’m not entirely all that happy being super modern anyway. I often feel like I was born in the wrong era. Maybe it is just that I’m feeling all domestic lately. All I know is that it has been a welcome distraction from all the nonsense going through my head lately. Things that do not help me move forward. So, whatever I can do to keep that from sinking into my head is a good thing.
Hopefully, the coming weeks will find me feeling more refreshed, inspired, and creative. Social media is something that I’ve never been very good at. But, I’m aiming to get better at it. So, you’ll be seeing me around more often.